ravings of a mad pony
by yosup7400
Summary: an impossible creature, his sanity lost to the purgatory. what will he do in this strange, happy world he has found himself in?
1. purgatory

Fog, that's all he could see. Fog. Unfortunately for him he had already gotten to know his surroundings through touch, as far as he could tell there was nothing he could use to reach the light. The one thing that confirmed that he could live again and it was just out of reach, he had no idea how he could reach it. He had already given up on sanity, it got him nowhere and had just been a cumbersome deadweight. He had to admit that it felt good to be crazy, he loved to have no mental limit. In the last few hours alone (then again he was unsure if it was just hours, he's forgotten time's passage altogether. You don't exactly need it in purgatory) he has already imagined a new color AND made mental blueprints for a machine that could turn the moon into REAL cheese. Actually, what IS the moon? He dropped it and assumed that he lost his full concept of the moon long ago, all he could remember is that the moon had something to do with cheese.

Crud, he just lost the blueprint.

He stumbled back toward the light in the center of his vast, empty prison. He sat at the edge of the white, fluorescent circle. He remained still, basking in what little warmth it provided. He stood back up and raised himself to the tips of the extremities of his legs, at least he assumed they were legs. He honestly couldn't see anything other than the light, being the strange phantom that he was, he lacked a real corporeal form, bound to the unreal flooring of his cell. He raised up what he assumed to be an appendage akin to an arm and barely touched the lip of the opening that let the light through. Sadly his "arm" took that exact moment to decide that it didn't have fingers and, therefore, was incapable of gripping the window. He fell back to the "ground" of his chamber, producing a soundless but impossibly loud thud that resounded throughout the purgatory, echoing without any surface to rebound off of.

Well that didn't go as planned, he would just have to wait.

"Twi, ah'm not sure 'bout this" applejack eyed the machine twilight had hooked her into. It it was a sand-colored box with three tesla coils poking out of its top at 45 degree angles, each one was sparking and sending currents to one of its neighbors. Something was telling her that this was a bad idea. The device was emitting a low hum as twilight carried a small tube in her mouth. The tube contained a strange metal that produced a golden glow.

Twilight placed the tube inside a receptacle that, as soon as Twilight let go, sealed itself up, removed the cap from the tube, and sucked the metal into its fuel system.

"what was that stuff?" applejack cocked her head to put emphasis on 'stuff'.

Twilight smiled at the opportunity to educate her friend "it's a rare material that can only be found in Horstrailia, it's called 'horstrailium'. It's got massive amounts of magical properties and makes the perfect fuel source for this baby." Twilight affectionately poked the machine.

"what's this thing s'posed t'do twilight?" Applejack broke into a cold sweat, if this 'horstralium' stuff is a rare as Twilight says, then that machine's going to do something big.

Now it was twilight's turn to start sweating, she knew applejack was sensitive about matters that this machine addressed, but applejack can see through lies. She'll just have to give it to her straight.

"umm, it's supposed to uhh…allow anypony who's connected to see the afterlife."


	2. new visitor

He just sat still, or for a more accurate description, he lay sprawled across the floor. He would cry if he could, but he lacked tear ducts along with every other body part a living creature should have. He didn't exist, and yet there he was locked away in a fate worse than death. What did he do to deserve this punishment? He wished he could remember, he wished the voices would come back. He was lonely, oh so lonely. There was nothing left he could do, he had already tried everything he could with the resources at hand, then again that means nothing. There were, after all, no resources to speak of. He just continued to lie there, doing nothing at all. After all, what was there to do? He couldn't even end his own suffering like others could in the mortal world…mortal world? There was a place other than here? He had forgotten almost everything about himself from before he got here. What did he DO!?

Before he was able to bother himself with more questions all of purgatory shook. Violently. As he saw it the gap letting in the light seemed to widen. As it did so he suddenly found his voice. Hadn't that been taken from him just like everything else? No matter. Now was his chance to call for help, something MUST be on the other side.

"HELP ME!"

He heard a shuffling sound . Is that a…hoof?...

Applejack stared at her for a moment, she couldn't read any emotion on twilight's face. The only thing that seemed to betray any emotion was the thin layer of sweat reflecting a minute glimmer from the rays of the laboratory's lights. Applejack broke off the stare and let out a frustrated sigh, hanging and shaking her head in disbelief. Twilight fidgeted uncomfortably for a moment, allowing an awkward silence to penetrate the room. Twilight was the first to speak.

"AJ, I know how you feel about these things and I should've told you earlier, but nopony else was willing to try. This could be a huge breakthrough, and we could finally know what happens to a pony when they pass!"

Applejack shook her head "ah understand how 'portant this is to ya, sugarcube, but ah don't think we should be messin' with things b'yond our control. It's somethin' that we aint meant t'know, afterall, how do ya'll think everypony will react if there's nothing after death? It'd probably cause mass panic, yknow?"

Twilight turned around and faced the plaque on the wall _"knowledge is power, but without control it is a weapon"_

"Applejack I-I need to know." A single tear ran down twilight's muzzle, "I need to know if he's okay"

Applejack gave her a pained grin "twi, ah know that ya cared for your father very much, I'm sure that he is in a better place now"

"no…you're not sure, no one is certain, not even celestia herself knows." Twilight began to sob, she missed her father too much for words to describe, she didn't even get to say goodbye. On some nights she lets the tears fall, hoping that the sound of them hitting the floor reaches her father. She wanted him to know how much she missed him, no, she NEEDED him to know.

Applejack just continued to watch, wishing that there were some way for her to comfort twilight. She turned away from the messy heap of tears that was her friend. She couldn't stand to see her friends suffering so much. She wanted to help twilight, she knew what she had to do, but she got the feeling that it would go terribly wrong.

"twi, ah'll go along with your test. Ah suppose that it could help us."

Twilight stood back up swiping the tears staining her coat away with the flick of a hoof, but they continued to fall one by one, leaving small dark circles behind on the mahogany flooring.

"*sniff* thanks applejack" twilight put on a sad smile and slowly shuffled towards the machine.

"are you ready?"

"no, but let's do it anyways"

Twilight nodded and flicked a red switch on the control panel. The machine started humming again and sent an electrical pulse up through the wire connected to applejack's forehead.

As soon as the pulse made contact applejack's eyes began to glow a bright white. The room began to shake, causing the machine to tumble over on its side. Twilight slowly made her way towards applejack to disconnect the machine. But found that the lab was shaking too violently for her to retain a reliable foothold. She fell to the floor, yelling towards applejack to unplug the machine, but her cries were overshadowed by the deep rumbling of the quaking floor. As the laboratory shook, a small indent started to form. Twilight watched as that indent grew, the floorboards soundlessly collapsing into the ever-expanding sinkhole as a white mist began to float out the orifice.

The rumbling soon stopped as did the sizeable hole between Twilight and Applejack. Applejack's eyes soon closed and she collapsed to the floor.

"HELP ME!" a strange voice called out of the crevice. It was an indescribable voice, one that seemed impossible, like something that shouldn't be known, let alone be remembered. Twilight crawled over to the gaping aperture, trying to see just who called for help. Seeing nothing she reached down with her right foreleg.

She felt a cold presence grip her hoof, it felt unnatural, a small part of her mind was telling her that what she was doing went against all laws of ethics and nature. This shouldn't be happening, and yet here this was. The presence tugged twice, it wanted out. She began to pull. The strange entity, for the most part, seemed to carry no mass. Once her hoof was above the fog the entity suddenly got heavier.

Twilight will never forget what she saw. A hoof coalesced out of thin air, she could see it's sudden end just above the fog. She pulled harder. A second hoof appeared next to the one she was pulling, it swayed side to side, searching for something to grab onto. It gripped the edge of the opening and began to pull itself up. Twilight continued heave, more of the entity forming from the fog. Soon the head formed. A stallion, he had a dark purple coat, almost black. Red eyes that gently shifted to purple halfway up the iris, then to blue in the top half. They were filled with fear, but at the same time hope. The very same hope that comes with the discovery of freedom. His mane was a slightly brighter shade of purple from the rest of his body and was parted directly above his left eye. His right eye was half-covered by his mane, even twilight had to admit, he had a long mane for a stallion.

He eventually gripped the ledge with his back legs and, with an exertive grunt, pushed himself the rest of the way out of the hole. Now that twilight could get a better look at him she was able to see his cutie mark and tail. His tail was brushed down in a straight and organized manner, not dissimilar to her own. His cutie mark was a gear with six wings of fire protruding out of six of the teeth of the gear.

The stranger continued to stand there, staring at her. He looked terrified, but at the same time seemed intrigued. Looks like he won't speak first so she might as well.

"hello, my name's twilight sparkle"


	3. one-sided introductions

**A/N: just so everyone knows, every chapter is going to be longer than the last. I set this challenge for myself to ensure that chapters don't end up being too short.**

**P.S. please don't forget to review. I need to know when I make mistakes so that I may fix them later on.**

She raised her hoof and pointed it toward him…how should he respond? He hasn't been in this situation in lord knows how long, if ever! He reached out his hoo- wait, hoof? He has a body? How was this possible?

He continued to stare at his hoof in confusion as he left twilight hanging.

She lowered her hoof and studied his expression, confusion, fear, curiosity. His face was surprisingly easy to read, did he even know how to control it?

"uhh… I guess you've never had a body before?" it was a reasonable question, he did, after all, appear above the fog. He blinked and looked back up at her. He continued to stare for a moment before he turned his attention back to his body. He started to tear up, an ear-to-ear grin crept up his face. He was alive again! He could cry, he could laugh, he could explode with joy. His heart's gentle beating drummed through his ears. With every beat a light pressure crossed his body, his blood pulsating with every thump that rang in his ears. He let the tears fall, the feeling of them running down his cheeks and muzzle was something he would never forget. He soon noticed a slight soreness across his face, he soon realized he was smiling. Smiling! He could express himself again!

HE. WAS. ALIVE!

He broke out into laughter, a hearty laugh that eventually degraded into wheezing, then convulsions that simulated his breathless mirth. He fell on his side, he could feel the floorboards rub against his side, he could feel his fur brushing them and himself. He tried to stop laughing, but the joy just kept coming. He couldn't stop! He had to though, from what he could remember he needs to breathe or bad things happen. He forced himself to stop and take a deep breath. Once his breathing normalized he pulled himself back up on his hooves.

Twilight giggled at his antics and gave him a warm smile, "heh, I guess not." She pointed to herself "my name is twilight sparkle."

He raised an eyebrow and pointed a hoof towards her, she nodded "twilight sparkle." She repeated, then pointed at him. "you?"

Confound it! How does she make words? He opened his mouth and exhaled. Nope. That doesn't cut it, rrgh, how does she do it? He made a noise once when he…what was it?...what was the word?...whatever…he remembered that some creatures made a sound when hurt, maybe he could do it that way, figure out how his voice works.

Twilight watched as he raised his forehoof and jammed hit into his gut. He grunted, as soon as he processed the fact that he made the sound he recreated it, this time without hurting himself. He smiled again, then made another sound experimentally. Twilight cocked her head, "do you not know how to speak?"

There she goes again with words! He got his voice figured out, but he still couldn't make words! HOW!? He made another noise, but this time he put his tongue on the roof of his mouth. There it was! He made a different sound! Does that mean he would have to move his mouth-parts in different ways JUST to communicate with another sapient being!? Man, talking was harder than he remembered it ever being. He tried again but with the back end of his tongue plastered against his back teeth. Again, he made a new sound.

"but…you yelled for help earlier, in equestrian no less! Do you even understand what I'm saying?" she took a step toward him.

He gave her a questioning look, then slowly nodded. What are the odds that two entirely different beings could speak the same language? He would have to do the math later. Now the real question is…HOW DOES THIS SPEAKING THING WORK!? He stomped his forehoof in frustration. He was going nowhere fast, he had more speech impediments than a newborn infant!

There was only one reason twilight could think of for his inability to speak properly, "h-how old ARE you?" he shrugged, he didn't bother keeping track of the years he spent there. It was supposed to be eternity anyhow.

Twilight's gaze suddenly turned to his left, going beyond him and passing on to applejack, "oh no! I forgot about applejack!" she galloped past him and made her way to her apricot-colored friend. "applejack! Are you alright!?" she shook her, causing her to sleepily groan.

"uhn, five moar minutes" she moaned. Twilight relaxed a little bit, her friend was okay. Using that machine probably took it all out of her.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the pitter-patter of her number-one assistant's small footsteps making their way down the stairs.

"twilight! Are you okay? There was shaking and-" his sentence was cut short when he saw a strange stallion standing on one side of a gaping hole in the center of the room, looking confused as twilight stood on the other side of it, tending to applejack. Something was off about the stranger, spike felt like it was some sort of intrusion, an invasion of privacy. He wanted to yell at him, tell him to leave and, if need be, throw him out himself. He restrained himself. Why did he just suddenly dislike this guy? He hasn't even done anything yet to merit such a reaction.

"uh, twilight? Who's that?" spike resumed his stare.

Twilight turned from applejack and faced spike. "I don't really know, neither does he." She gestured toward the stranger. "all we know for certain is that he came from here." She turned down toward the gaping hole in the center of the room.

"hey, do you think you could help me with applejack?" the stranger turned to twilight and nodded in response. He trotted over to the sleeping form of applejack, her chest slowly rising and falling as she quivered and shuffled, her dreams taking minor control of her movements.

"I guess we'll carry her, she's pretty heavy" she sighed as she almost took a step forward, but before she could reach for applejack the stranger's hoof blocked her path. He shook his head and pointed to himself.

She raised her eyebrows at his gesture, "are you sure? I'm not joking when I say she isn't exactly the lightest of ponies." He nodded and began to tuck his head underneath applejack's torso. He should be the one to carry her, he may have lost his concept of common sense, but that doesn't mean he had abandoned ethics altogether. He still understood that it would probably make a better first impression that breaking down on the floor laughing…wait…laughing? So THAT'S what it was he was trying to say! Eitherwhats he needed to make friends, he was in someplace entirely new populated by sentient horses and it would probably do him SOME good not to become a public menace.

He lifted up his head and let applejack roll down his neck to rest at the small of his back. He gave twilight a reassuring look, though she wasn't kidding when she said this 'applejack' was heavy, he was certain that he could carry her a sufficient distance. Twilight nodded and led him out of the laboratory. As they moved up the stairs the stranger marveled at how applejack's body seemed to behave without a second thought. He could feel every individual beat of her heart as his heart slowed to match it. His breathing synchronized to mirror hers. Twilight opened a small birch door at the top of the winding staircase, as the exit widened small rays of sunlight penetrated the atmosphere of the corridor. They soon entered twilight's living room.

Twilight gestured to the couch, "just lay her down there for now, I need to notify Princess Celestia of what just happened, feel free to sit down and read a book for a moment. C'mon spike" she then waved her hoof towards the extensive collection of books lining the wall and beckoned spike to follow her. He followed but gave the stranger one more passing glance. He still didn't really trust him, he got the feeling that something horrible was going to happen if he was left alone. Well either way there wasn't much he could do about it, he hasn't necessarily done anything to support spike's suspicions on the matter. He decided to leave it for the time being, and continued on his way up the stairs.

_Dear princess celestia,_

_Something happened while I was experimenting today. I'm not entirely sure how it happened, but a sinkhole opened up in the middle of the laboratory floor during the experiment. I ended up pulling somepony out of it, I'm not entirely certain about who he is or where he's from. He can understand equestrian but can't seem to speak. It's like it's his first time ever having a mouth. He seems to understand etiquette, as he carried an unconscious applejack out of the laboratory for me. I need your help, I'm not really sure what to do with him._

_Your faithful student, Twilight sparkle._


	4. lollipops, royalty, and names

**A/N: sorry about the wait, I was on a road trip and don't exactly have anything that I can reliably write with other than my desktop.**

** Don't forget to review**

Spike rolled up the letter and placed a wax seal on it, he then blew a gentle puff of fire onto the paper. It disintegrated into a sparkling cloud before flying out the window toward canterlot.

"well, that's that. I wonder what our new friend's doing?" with that twilight trotted to the door and nudged it open.

He gently rolled Applejack off his back and on to the couch, as he did so he got a grasp of his surroundings. From what he could tell, this 'twilight sparkle' lived in a library, albeit a small one. He cantered over to one of the bookshelves titled '_History & Culture_' and started scanning the titles until he stopped on a title that caught his eye: 'ethics and morals'. He got the feeling that he should get to know the ethics of this culture first, after all he wouldn't want to accidentally offend somebody by simply making an incorrect gesture. He grasped the spine of the leather book with both hooves and pulled it out from between two other nearly identical books. He sat down on a small green chair adjacent to the couch and pulled the book open, but before he could begin reading twilight had already started making her way down that stairs.

"I see you found something to read." Twilight said more to herself that anyone else. He took a quick glance at the book he had pulled out, "want to know more about equestria? I understand why, if I were in your position I'd do the same" the stranger put the book down and repositioned himself on the chair. He found himself most comfortable with his forelegs at his sides and rear legs dangling over the threshold of the chair's cushion.

Twilight raised her eyebrows "you sit just like lyra…" he cocked his head at her comment. "s-sorry…she's a friend of mine." Twilight put out a nervous laugh. He slowly nodded then turned his attention to one of the library windows as a bird flew by. Suddenly spike came racing down the stairs with a rolled up note in hand.

"twilight! The princess wants to see us immediately, she's already sent the chariots and everything!" Twilight quickly pulled the scroll from spike's hand with her magic. She unfurled it and quickly scanned it over before rolling it back up and giving it back to spike.

She looked to the stranger with a worried expression just as a gentle knock came to her door. She trotted to it and opened it.

A royal guard dressed in ivory armor with light purple trim stood in the doorway. "twilight sparkle, her majesty requests an audience with you and the visitor immediately." He maintained a pokerface as he awaited a response from twilight.

"y-yes, of course." She gestured for the stranger to follow her before turning to spike. "spike, if applejack wakes up before we get back, tell her we are having an audience with the princess." Spike gave her a stiff salute with the hand he carried the scroll in. she smiled at his gesture before turning back toward the guard and nodding. He nodded as well and escorted twilight and the stranger outside to the chariot. The stranger took that moment to get a good look at the outside of the library, which, to his astonishment, was a large hollowed out tree with several windows and a small balcony. He unknowingly stepped onto the chariot and was about to try to get twilight to tell him why the library was a TREE of all things, but the chariot took off before he could make an attempt. As they continued to ascend he got a sudden craving for a lollipop, he wasn't entirely sure why he wanted a lolli, all he knew was that he did, and therefore he REALLY NEEDED A LOLLIPOP! He turned to twilight with pleading eyes, but she didn't notice. Why musn't ANYONE notice when he needs JUST. ONE. LOLLIPOP!

He didn't realize it but his constant thoughts of sweet confections placed at the ends of sticks distracted him from the fact that the chariot was now descending toward the capital city of equestria, canterlot.

The chariot soon made contact with a white brick runway that was directly connected to the castle itself. The stranger was pulled from his thoughts as soon as he realized that Twilight had already stepped off and was waiting patiently for him to follow.

"you coming?" She asked playfully as he made his way off the chariot and towards her. He nodded and she started toward the castle throne room.

She glanced back at him nervously as they neared a large set of wooden doors. One door was engraved with an orange sun, the other with a white moon. The doors opened to reveal a large marble chamber with a single throne in the center, upon it sat princess celestia.

Twilight immediately bowed to her. The stranger glanced at her the turned back to celestia, it took him a moment to realize that he was standing before royalty and, therefore, needs to show his respect. He stiffly and awkwardly bowed down to celestia, who let out a soft chuckle at his apparent embarrassment.

She gave both twilight and the stranger a warm smile and stepped down from her throne. "rise, both of you. There's no need for such formalities right now." The stranger relaxed and sat on his haunches as did twilight.

Celestia turned to him, "so, you have no memory of who you are, where you're from, how to speak, or how you got to equestria?" he shook his head. Celestia gave him a light smile, "I can't help you with your memories" the stranger deflated slightly. "but I think I can help you with your speaking problem." He suddenly perked up slightly, completely negating his previous expression. She chuckled at his almost childlike responses to everything she told him.

she took a step toward him, "just hold still, this should help." She lowered her horn to his forehead as a faint gold aura surrounded it. He felt a slight tingling in his lower jaw which spread out through the rest of his head before quickly dissipating.

She brought her head back up, "well? Try to say something."

He flicked his ear in thought before deeply inhaling, "*gasp*…Icertainlyhopethisworksbeacauseifitdoesn't thanIamgoingtobesadagainandIdon'tlikebeingsad!" he exclaimed before quickly covering his mouth with his forehoof in shock.

Twilight noticed that his voice was somewhat throaty but at the same time wasn't all that deep. He seemed like he'd have a wide voice range, but she wasn't entirely certain.

He took another breath, "i-I can speak now…how did you do it?" he looked at celestia with thankful eyes.

She chuckled "a simple memory spell, I gave you the knowledge of how to work your thoughts into words." He suddenly gave her an incredulous look.

"but I thought that you couldn't help me with my memories" he cocked his head.

She shook her head, "I can't, I gave you a copy of my memories of how to speak. I didn't pull them from your own."

He nodded "okay, but what do I do now? I mean, I don't exactly have a place to live."

She put her hoof on his shoulder, "don't worry about that, I'm sure twilight or one of her friends can house you for now, I might be able to commission a home for you somewhere later on."

He nodded again, "thank you, princess…" he said hesitantly.

"is something wrong?" twilight cast him a worried glance.

He sighed "I just hate this feeling of uncertainty, I want to know what happened before I came here. Who I was and what I did before…" twilight frowned "before what?" "n-nothing" he looked away from her nervously.

Celestia nuzzled him gently, "I'm certain that your memories will come back to you soon enough. For now you'd best be heading back to ponyville to set up housing arrangements."

He smiled, "thank you princess, I guess we'll be going. Goodbye…" He and twilight turned to leave as the princess gave them a motherly smile.

"goodbye, we will speak again soon." She waved as the doors to the throne room closed.

Twilight and the stranger made their way back to a waiting carriage ready to take them back to ponyville. The flight back was silent and uneventful. Both ponies too occupied by their own thoughts to form any intelligent conversation. They soon landed in front of the library at about midday, twilight's stomach grumbled causing her to blush.

"heh…I guess I never actually got breakfast…" twilight nervously laughed.

The stranger hummed to himself, "I guess we could get something to eat, I haven't eaten anything in who knows how long. "

Twilight nodded, "yeah…I guess I could get my friends to meet you too. By the way, do you remember your name?"

"no" he shook his head "but I guess I'm gonna need one if I'm staying here long term…" he glanced at his cutie mark "what are these supposed to mean?" he threw her a questioning look.

"oh, that's your cutie mark" he momentarily cringed at the name, fortunately twilight didn't notice, "it represents your special talent, basically it's an image of what you do best and what makes you different from everypony else. It's a representation of who you are and is a part of you."

He glanced back at his cutie mark, an eight-toothed gear with six plumes of orange flame extending out evenly on each side. He said the first name that came to mind, "flare cogs."

Twilight stopped and turned to face him. "what?"

"flare cogs" he repeated "call me flare cogs."


	5. not-so-one-sided introductions, maybe

**A/N: hallo, sorry about taking my sweet ol' time with this one. I had originally planned for this chapter to be far longer than it actually is, but I decided that it would be the foolish of me to end the chapter in any other way than I did. Anyhoo, again I apologize for taking so long. My inspiration petered out about halfway through then came back near the end.**

**P.S. I'll give a cookie to the first person who figures out where my inspiration died.**

**Don't forget to review.**

* * *

"okay, flare cogs it is!" twilight smiled then started moving at a slow trot. "anyway, we're going to a place called 'sugarcube corner'. We can get something to eat there. One of my friends lives there too, just be careful, she can be a bit off-putting at times but she doesn't mean any harm."

Flare nodded as they came up to a building that seemed to be made of various confections and a large amount of gingerbread. Twilight pushed open a set of western-style double doors, holding them open for him.

"thank you" flare muttered softly so only twilight could hear.

Suddenly, a blur of pink flew through his vision as a very exited shrill voice cried out, "ooh ooh ooh! Who are you? What's your name? are you new here? I didn't even need to ask the last question, I already know you're new here 'cause I know everypony in ponyville! *gasp* this calls for a PARTY! " with that the pink blur took off without giving twilight or flare a chance to say anything.

Twilight laughed nervously "yeah…that was pinkie pie. As I said she doesn't mean any harm. She's just a bit crazy." Flare nodded slowly, still a bit dazed by the strange occurrence. He quickly recovered and smiled. He liked pinkie pie already, she seemed like someone who could understand him. He gazed toward the various shelves loaded with a wide assortment of cakes, candies and other sweets. His gaze stopped on a single treat amongst the sea of delicious foods. The one thing that he had be deprived of for far too long. A lollipop.

Twilight noticed the apparent bright sparkle of joy in his eyes, "did you find something you wanted?" he continued to stare as he slowly brought up his hoof to point at the large red and yellow lollipop. She raised an eyebrow, "a lollipop? Okay, if that's what you want…" twilight walked to the counter and rung the small brass bell sitting atop it.

A short and slightly rotund mare with a blue coat and pink mane walked to the counter from the kitchen, "why hello twilight, what can I do for you today?" she smiled softly, her voice was almost a stereotypical level of motherly. Flare couldn't help but wonder what her mane would taste like. It looked like someone just put red food coloring in whipped cream before plopping it on her head with a giant spoon. He abandoned the thought immediately, the most important thing is the lollipop that he is about to get.

Twilight smiled "can I have a blueberry muffin and that lollipop, please?" she pointed to the bright swirl of red and yellow.

The mare took the lollipop off the self and pulled a muffin from the display box on the corner of the counter, "that'll be three bits" twilight nodded and pulled three small coins seemingly out of nowhere then placed them on the counter.

Twilight picked up both of the treats with her magic, "thanks Mrs. Cake!" she levitated the lollipop to flare cogs as she took a bite out of her muffin. He let out a gentle squee as soon as he got a grip of it. He stared at it gleefully for a few seconds before he widened his jaw to the point of nearly unhinging it. He then snapped down on the treat resulting in a loud crunch as the lollipop practically disintegrated from the pressure. The lollipop in its entirety was now in pieces in his mouth. He swallowed the pieces, completely disregarding the fact that he basically swallowed edible shards of glass that tore his esophagus to shreds. He didn't care, he eliminated his craving and now he could easily focus on the task at hand. What was the task again?...oh, yes it was acquainting himself with this strange world he now resided in.

Twilight stared at him in shock, "um…did you just eat a lollipop with a five inch diameter WHOLE?"

Flare nodded delightfully, "yup! I've been craving a lollipop since the flight to the princess. You try holding yourself back when you're craving the most amazing food in the world for five hours!" he stomped his hoof playfully, grinning as he did.

Twilight chuckled, "well don't blame me when you get sick." She started toward the door, "well, why don't you introduce yourself to my friends, I'm sure one of them can house you for awhile, if not I always can."

He trotted after her, "okay, I already think that pinkie pie and I will get along very well. So who are you introducing me to next?"

"I think you should probably get to know rarity next, she lives and works at the boutique down the road." She gestured to a large multi-layered circular building standing in a small clearing beyond the end of the avenue.

They both moved at a quick trot and soon reached the boutique. Twilight pushed the door open, ringing a bell hanging just above the door. Suddenly a white unicorn happily trotted out of a separate room.

"welcome to- oh hello twilight!" rarity gave twilight a quick hug before turning her attention to flare, "who is this?"

"hello, I'm flare cogs" he shook her hoof politely.

Twilight stepped in, "rarity, I need you to meet me at the library at three. We have some important things to discuss regarding flare cogs."

rarity cocked her head, "why? That's wrong?"

twilight shook her head, "nothing's wrong, rarity. We just need to get housing arrangements for him."

"housing arrangements?" she looked at flare, "do you not have a home?" he shrugged nervously in response.

"we'll explain at the library. Until then I need to let the others know." Twilight began dragging flare out the door.

"okay, I'll be there." Rarity waved before turning back and heading into another room of the boutique.

The door closed quietly as twilight and flare walked back to the center of town.

Flare cast twilight an annoyed glance, "what was that about? I barely got to introduce myself…what's the rush?"

"you'll be able to get to know everypony at the meeting. I'm sorry if I'm rushing a bit it's just…"

"just what? Is there something wrong?"

Twilight looked away nervously, "n-Nothing. Nothing's wrong, don't worry about it."

Flare gave her a concerned look. She was a terrible liar, but he decided to play along for the time being.

"well, I guess we could see applejack next…" an expression of shock suddenly figured itself on her muzzle, "applejack! I totally forgot!" twilight began moving at a full gallop in the direction of the library, Flare following close behind.

The soon came upon the hollowed out tree, twilight bursting through the door to see the couch that applejack was placed upon was empty. Spike soon came down the stairs as flare entered behind twilight.

"oh, hey twilight. Applejack left already, she said that if you wanted to find her she'd be at sweet apple acres." Spike was dusting off a small ruby with a white cloth.

Twilight let out a breath she was unaware she was holding as she relaxed, "okay, thanks spike." She turned to flare, "I guess we'll be going to sweet apple acres then. See ya, spike!" twilight turned and waved as she walked out the door. Flare looked at her confused. That was awkwardly short. If this is an everyday occurrence than he wasn't entirely certain he wanted to know how strange something had to be in order for it to be called 'unique'. He shrugged it off and followed twilight at a quick trot to the edge of town.

The path soon changed from a wide road speckled by gravel to a simple, dirt road with half the width. The pair soon came upon a fenced-in area. The fence, at least to flare cogs, seemed to stretch on forever in both directions, interrupted only by a simple wood arch embroidered by several apples, a small sign hung off the arch by a pair of chains. It read 'sweet apple acres' in an old west font.

"so… is this it?" flare raised his eyebrows at the sheer amount of apple trees lining the thresholds of the path. Twilight nodded and continued forward as they came up to a small hill. Beyond it a farmyard came into view, a small red barn planted next to a decently-sized house. A familiar orange mare walked out the barn door with a large basket placed precariously on her back. She stopped upon noticing the lavender mare and midnight-purple stallion perched atop the small rise. She put the basket down then quickly trotted in their direction.

"Howdy, twilight. Who's your friend?" Applejack smiled warmly, though it wasn't sincere. Something was off about that stallion, it felt like he shouldn't be standing there. But he had an innocent glimmer in his eyes, she shouldn't be thinking of someone she hasn't even had one conversation with this way. But… something about him just seemed…wrong...

Twilight shared a knowing look with applejack, she shared the sentiment, "this is flare cogs."

He smiled brightly and shook her hoof, the grin seemed eerily resemblant of a certain pink mare she knew. The similarities were too blatant to ignore. "y'know, there's a friend of mine ah think you'd get along well with. Her name's pinkie pie."

Flare nodded, "I already met her, well…kinda…it's more like I got to hear her rant about me being new here just before she ran off looking for party supplies. I didn't get to say a word before she left."

Applejack sighed "yup, that sounds like pinkie alright. Ah'll bet she's gonna make it a surprise party. She tends t'do that kinda thing."

"Applejack" twilight said worriedly "did you see anything when-" "I wish I could tell you…" applejack interrupted, "but it's like a dream…I know I saw somethin', but I just can't remember what it was that I saw… sorry twi…" twilight's head drooped as an unreadable expression plastered itself across her face.

"umm…it's okay, applejack. We'll just have to try again some other time…I guess…" flare cogs gave the pair a worried expression, clearly he had come here on accident…well, he had actually determined that as soon as he made eye contact with twilight the first time, but this conversation just reinforced the fact.

"I…" flare rubbed the back of his neck, "I know that I wasn't supposed to be there, whatever I kept from happening… I'll try to make it up to you somehow. Even if I don't know what it is I ruined" twilight smiled sadly.

Suddenly, a small image coalesced from the empty, black recesses of his mind. An image of sorrow, a figure, silhouetted in a deep fog, bent over in pain. Above the shape were letters that seemed to be written of a material formed from the hatred of soul upon soul, 'useless' was the word the hateful symbols formed. The image was so full of hurt, so full of hatred and sorrow, regret and disappointment. The image caused flare to draw in a quick breath of shock… he remembered it…that moment in his life. It was one of his own memories.

One of many.


	6. Heart Attacks

**A/N: sorry about this taking so long, I had many a distraction in the past few weeks and I have no one other than myself to blame. unfortunately I'm starting my first year of high school on the day that this is posted, so other chapters from here on will be even less common.**

**please don't forget to review.**

Flare staggered back a few steps, feeling as if a thousand needles pierced his heart in rapid succession. He took a widened stance, trying not to fall to the ground as he gasped for air. That memory was horrific, he silently prayed to any entity with the time and capability to understand his predicament and assist in such matters that his other memories wouldn't leave behind such a scar as this one did… That was the longest run-on thought he had formulated in quite some time. He shook his head, there was a time and a place for that and this situation met none of the two requirements. What did this memory mean? Was he abused previously? _Of course asking these questions mentally is entirely pointless as the answers are impossible to discern at the moment…_

Twilight and Applejack both stared at him confusedly, one moment he was offering help, the next he looks horrified, and soon after that his face is scrunched up in deep thought, his little pink tongue jutting out at an awkward angle. Twilight was beginning to worry, he seemed a tad bit unstable. "uh…flare? Are you okay?"

He refocused from the thousand-yard stare he had adopted and brought his attention to the two clearly confused mares. "oh, well…yes, and no. It's a bit hard to explain but I think I just got a memory back. I'm not entirely certain what it entails about my past, though…" Flare trailed off, slowly reentering his own little world of thought.

Applejack raised an eyebrow in curiosity, "what in th'hay are y'all goin' on 'bout?"

Twilight glanced between the zoned-out Flare Cogs and confused Applejack for a moment, trying to formulate the words in her head, "um…well, the reason you were passed out on the couch was that instead of letting you see clearly into the afterlife, the uhh…machine _may_ have opened up a portal to Celestia knows where. I pulled flare cogs here out of it…"

Flare raised his hoof to stop twilight as he took a step forward, looking into applejack's eyes he said, "it turns out I can't remember anything about who I was before twilight pulled me into this world, but from the looks of it I _might_ just be able to get my memory back if what just happened is any indication."

"soo… what was the memory about, Flare?" Twilight was worried further by his response.

Flare scratched the back of his head with a foreleg, wincing as he felt another sting in his heart, "I-I'd rather not talk about it for now… It would probably better to wait until I have more memories to connect it with, that way I can confirm if it means what I think it means." He was lying of course, the image was too emotionally scarring for him to talk about it without breaking into tears. Luckily he was good at hiding emotions, he knew that much. Unfortunately for him, applejack saw through the lie with ease.

_I've only known him for a few minutes and he's already lying through his teeth about his past._ This brought her suspicion to an entirely different level from where it stood previously, first being just a silly feeling of uncertainty before instantly escalating to outright distrust.

"okay, I understand I guess…" she turned to applejack, "Anyway, we're going to be meeting back at the library at three, do you think you can make it?"

Applejack looked at the nonexistent watch on her wrist, slightly confusing flare in the process, "yup, ah'll definitely be there." She studied him further for a moment, trying to think of reasons for hiding his memories. _His reaction to the memory… it was something very bad, something that shouldn't be remembered._

Twilight nodded eagerly before a look of realization figured itself on her muzzle, "hey applejack, do you think you could tell rainbow dash? I don't really have any idea where she could be right now and you usually have knack for finding her."

"sure, ah was just goin' t'practice some applebuckin' anyway." With that applejack started trotting off to ponyville.

Twilight waved, "alright, I'll see you later then." Flare quietly copied twilight's gesture as applejack moved out of earshot.

"well she seemed kinda nice." Flare smiled warmly. _If everybody in this place is as nice as the ones I've met so far I wouldn't mind living here…_

"that she is, everypony I've met here so far have been so kind to me. I never knew what having a friend really meant until I came here, I was always a shut-in who disregarded having friends as a simple waste of time." Twilight began to look almost nostalgic as she mentally recalled her first moments with her friends, and every adventure that followed that fateful day.

Flare let out a soft sigh as his brow furrowed, "I wonder if I had friends before, if I'm worrying them with my absence, or if I was even important to those around me. Did I matter, or was my entire existence just background noise that was simply ignored? _I honestly wish I knew…_"

Twilight put a hoof on flares withers, smiling warmly she said, "Flare Cogs, would you like to be friends?"

Flare looked her in the eye and smiled back, amazed that she was able to say that _so easily_. Was it really that simple to make a friend? "y-yes, I would like to be friends. Thank you."

Twilight laughed softly as she looked to a small cottage in the distance, "well, we should get going. There's still one friend I need to introduce you to before we go back to the library."

Flare followed twilight's gaze to the little yellow house, "I'm guessing your friend lives there?"

"yep, let's go." They both briskly trotted in the general direction of the cottage, "so…twilight?"

"yes?"

"how long have you lived here?"

Twilight looked to the sky in thought for a moment, "well… for the better part of about three years now. It's kinda hard to keep track when you're having a good time, though."

Flare nodded understandingly, "I suppose it is…"

The pair soon came upon a small cobblestone bridge that crossed over a small stream. On the other side of it sat the cottage, it's walls were painted a homely shade similar to sand. The strangest feature in Flare's eyes was the fact that it was completely surrounded by birdhouses, foxholes, and molehills.

Twilight softly knocked on the door. It gently opened a sliver, revealing a small amount of pink.

"h-Hello?" Flare could barely hear the nearly inaudible whisper, causing his ears to twitch slightly.

"It's just me, Fluttershy" the door opened a little more in response.

A butter-colored mare took a step out of her cozy-looking abode, "Hi, twilight."

Flare stared at Fluttershy for a moment, he could feel a sudden pressure in his chest as soon as he saw her aquamarine eyes. Somehow she hadn't noticed him yet. _What is this pressure?_

"I have a new friend I'd like to introduce you to" twilight gestured to Flare as she spoke.

"hello, I'm Flare Cogs" He raised his hoof to shake hers but she seemed to shrink away from him, hiding her face behind her mane. The pressure in his chest grew to be almost painful. _okay, this hurts bad._

"I-…I'm…" she whispered something very quietly, too quietly for Flare to understand.

Flare cocked his head in a mixture of confusion and worry, "I'm sorry, what was that?"

"I'm…Fluttershy" she shrank back even further.

Flare's heart exploded, causing him to let out a pained grunt as he fell to the ground. _Oh, so THAT'S what that was._

Fluttershy quickly caught flare by the scruff of his neck, "oh no, not again.." she huffed in an annoyed fashion.

"w-…what just happened?" Twilight grabbed flare with her magic, raising him to a standing position.

Fluttershy shrugged, "I don't really know, the same thing happened a few weeks ago when Braeburn came to visit. I tried to ask him about it, but he'd change the subject every time…"

Flare looked at Fluttershy again. _She's so CUTE!_

"care to explain what happened, Flare?" Twilight asked, legitimate curiosity accenting her tone.

Flare could feel the blood rush to his ear tips at the thought of explaining. _'oh, that? Yeah, it's nothing, Fluttershy's just so cute I almost suffered from cardiac arrest just by looking at her'_. "um… I'd rather not…"

Twilight's eye twitched in response, "fine.." she turned to her butter-colored friend, "I guess it's just gonna be a mystery for now."

Fluttershy flinched slightly, "umm, I don't mind. It's okay, really."

_Why does she have to be so ADOREABLE!?_ Flare cogs cleared his throat, getting the attention of the pair, "so anyway, it's a pleasure to meet you Fluttershy."

She nodded nervously, "l-likewise…" she whispered.

_HNNNNNNG!_ Flare could feel the pressure again._ It'd probably be for the best if I got out of here._ "well, anyway, we need you to come to the library at three for an important meet-up."

"okay, I'll try to be there" she slowly backed into her cottage as the door shut from a small breeze.

As soon as the door's latch clicked Flare quickly started trotting away from the cottage, leaving behind a somewhat dumbfounded twilight. _he REALLY wanted to leave for some reason. I should ask him about it_. She started moving at a brisk gallop to catch up with Flare, who had already cleared the trees and was making his way through the field that connected the grove to ponyville.

"Flare, wait up!"

Flare stopped and turned to his lavender pursuer, "sorry twilight."

She slowed to a relaxed walk, "why did you run off like that?"

"for the same reason I almost had a heart attack."

She cocked her head, "and what reason is that?"

Flare's ear tips and cheeks reddened, "She's really cute…"

"oh, it looks like SOMEONE has eyes for Fluttershy~" she waggled her eyebrows jokingly.

"n-No! it's not like that! It's more like uh…"

Twilight smiled smugly, "oh sure it isn't!"

"r-Really, it's more like cute in a sense of when you see something like a puppy, or a kitten. Trust me, it's not like that."

"oh, okay. I TOTALLY believe you!" She said sarcastically.

Flare loosed a frustrated sigh as he pawed the ground in embarrassment.

Twilight giggled childishly, much to Flare's annoyance. "okay, I'll stop… maybe…" she grinned mischievously.

Flare's left eye twitched, "there's no convincing you is there?"

"Nope."

he snorted, "this is gonna be one of those days isn't it?"

"Yep."

He shook his head, trying to forget the entire interaction as he started moving in the direction of ponyville again. _Okay, I remember this happening at least ONCE before this._

She patted him on the back, "I'm just joking, Flare, don't worry."

Flare grumbled something unintelligible as they walked into town. Flare hadn't taken much note of it earlier , but the place was teeming with activity. Everywhere he turned there was something going on, someone buying a bushel of apples, a pair of fillies playing with a ball, a stallion pulling a cart full of who knows what. It amazed him how lively such a small town could be, and how everyone seemed to greet each other with a bright smile. It warmed his heart to see such friendliness amongst the townsponies, but he could feel something else at the bottom of his soul, something trying to tell him that all of this was wrong, the joviality, the peace. Something was missing, the word was at the tip of his tongue but seemed to remain in its place in mystery.

His thoughts were cut off when he bumped into a pinkish-grey stallion, "oh, I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention." He said with a slight lisp as Flare stumbled back a few steps.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't either." He got a good look at the stallion, his rust-colored mane was slicked back and short, as was his tail. He had a scroll with an hourglass sticking out on one end for a cutie mark.

"Anyway, hi, my name's dusty archive. What's your name?"


End file.
